Limericks about Governor Blagojevich

It has been a long time since I have been inspired to attempt some limericks. I made it through the entire Obama - McCain campain without writing any, which I can hardly believe. But the corrupt antics of Governor Rod Blagojevich of Illinois have left me no choice. I mean, what can you say about a guy that follows his predecessor's, George Ryan's, corrupt ways in putting state government up for sale? And to top it all off - to try to sell a US Senator's seat to the highest bidder!

Now that I think about it, the last time I wrote limericks, it was also because of a governor -Elliot Spitzer of New York. Despite having several teen age daughters (and a wife) he was caught cavorting with a prostitute barely older than his daughters. But Ryan and Blagojevich are even sleazier.

Ryan is now reflecting on his administration from prison, although I hear he is trying to get a pardon from President Bush. If that doens't work out, maybe Ryan and Blagojevich can be cell mates.

So here is a little break from training, fundraising, and cancer (other than the cancer of political corruption).

In the Midwestern Land of Abe Lincoln
There is something so rotten it’s stinkin’
Two govs in a row
Off to prison will go
Cause to get rich was all they were thinkin’

A Governor, name of Blagojevich
Through corruption had hoped to get rich
But his words caught on tape
Leave little hope of escape
From a major mid-life career switch.

In a reeking state government drama
Up for sale went the seat of Obama
While talking some trash
Rodney B. asked for cash
Pray tell, what would say his poor Mama?

Said Rod “Who’ll the next senator be?
Give a huge wad of cash right to me.
If I may be so bold
This thing’s made of gold
Did you think that you’d get it for free?”

With a tone that was quite like the mob
He demanded some loot or a job
For a Senator’s seat
In speech far from discrete
And many an F-Bomb he’d lob

Said George Ryan let me give you advice
Now that Govs will be locked up here twice
Please don’t be a dope
Never pick up the soap
Cause the folks you meet here are not nice

Governors stand on top of the heap
But Rod’s tastes and his wife’s were not cheap
If he goes to the Pen,
Is not heard from again,
I much doubt that folks will give a (bleep).

Art Ritter
December 2008